So I just got off the treadmill doing my day 2 of week 4 in my C25K program. I really didn't want to get on the treadmill today, but I did and I'm glad I did. I really used this time to think about things, and think about how things are going in my life. I did have the tv on and my ipod playing...but i kinda zoned them out and was thinking to myself, I almost missed the cues on when to run and when to walk.
Anyways, I have been on this get fit journey of mine for 8 weeks. 8 weeks ago I signed up for weight watchers online, because it has worked for me in the past. One morning I got up and stepped on the scale, when I saw that number I was really disgusted in myself. I felt awful about how I let myself go, and how I always miss out on opportunities because I let my weight get the best of me. But I decided no longer did I want to do that. My older sister had been on weight watchers for a while, and I saw how much she had done and how great she looked, and I wanted that too. So I decided to get my but into gear. I wouldn't even sign up for weight watchers until I got under that awful number. (I'm too embarrassed to share now what that number is, but if you really want to know ask me, and maybe i'll tell ya)
I lost about 5 pounds, and decided it was time. The first weeks were great, I was really on track, and loosing about 2lbs a week. I was very excited. But then Garrett came home on spring break, and i really cant blame it on him, but i was hanging out with him more, and not eating right. I did gain that week but it was less then a pound. But that was enough to make me feel down about myself and try and get back on track. I stayed the same weight for about 3 weeks, and wasn't seeing any results, that's when I decided i needed to do something more, I started the c25k program, and signed up for zumba over in antrim. That's when i saw the weight start to come off again. Slowly but it was better then staying the same.
Last week on my weigh in day i had lost a total of 12 pounds, add the first 5 for that and that's about 17 pounds total. I feel better about myself, and I'm loosing inches, and i just feel better, mentally and physically.I still have days when i don't want to get out of bed because i feel terrible about my body, but then i realize that staying in bed isn't going to help the situation.
I'm really happy for all my friends support, I think its great, and I really love all you guys for giving me words of encouragement and helping my push through hard times. Thank you so much!!
I really wish I had this kind of encouragement at home. No one has told me that I'm looking good, or that they are proud of me for what I'm doing. The first few weeks were good, my mom and dad were eating healthier with me ( i still live at home) but then something happened and they eat the same old crap again, and it doesn't help me at all, this week we are having Salisbury steak...hello hamburger, gravy, potatoes....I love that meal and I can't really eat much of it, or I need to eat a small lunch, or no lunch, or i need to work out a lot to have the points for it. It kinda stinks. I wish they were on the plan with me, It would be so great to have a support system like that.
Then I have my boyfriend Garrett. He supports me, but in a weird way. He will say things like, i don't think you should be eating that, and yes that is helpfull
He has made me kinda mad and sad a lot lately, but mostly when he is at school and I'm stuck at home, hoping for an e-mail from him. but when he walks through my door on Fridays my whole world lights up again, and I'm just so happy to see him, He really means everything to me, and I don't ever want to loose him.
Now I'm getting sappy and its time to stop venting and go have a good cry in the shower. If you read thanks for listening.
I love you guys!!!